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Last week, I received an unexpected call from Bill Mares, an old friend. Bill told me that he had terminal lymphoma and had only days to live. He was home in hospice care, which focuses on a person’s quality of life as they near death. And he had chosen to make use of Vermont’s medical aid-in-dying law, which passed in 2013.
He had a few things on his mind that he wanted to share. He was medicated when we spoke but still sharp, thoughtful and funny.
Bill died on Monday, July 29, just a week after our conversation. He was 83 years old. His wife Chris told me that his final week was filled with visits from over 70 friends. Bill regaled them with stories from his long and colorful life. No matter how serious the topic or dire the situation, he would find the humor in it. He believed deeply in the power of a good laugh.
Bill Mares was raised in Texas and educated at Harvard, where he majored in history, and the Fletcher School of Law and Diplomacy at Tufts, where he received a master’s degree. He was a former journalist, state representative and high school history teacher in Vermont. For over a decade, he was a regular commentator on Vermont Public Radio.
He authored or co-authored 20 books on subjects ranging from the U.S. Marines, to desert travel, to Vermont humor. His books include Real Vermonters Don’t Milk Goats (with Frank Bryan), and his latest, I Could Hardly Keep From Laughing: An Illustrated Collection of Vermont Humor (with Don Hooper). His memoir, Better to Be Lucky Than Smart, will be published posthumously later this year.
Among the many nonprofit organizations to which he gave his time and talents, Bill was a board member of the Vermont Journalism Trust, the parent organization of VTDigger.
Bill called me to talk about how he was approaching his last days. He especially wanted others to know that the end of life could be peaceful and beautiful with medical aid-in-dying.
Vermont is one of 10 states that has such a law, as well as Washington D.C. In 2023, Vermont revised it to become the first state to permit medical aid-in-dying to qualifying patients from anywhere, regardless of the state in which they live. To qualify, a patient must meet strict criteria, including having a terminal illness with six months or less to live and have two physicians sign off.
“I had the chance to drive the bus of my own disappearance,” he said of how he was ending his life.
Bill asked me if I would record our conversation. We both knew it would likely be the last time we talked.
“I was never an expert in anything. But I was good enough for it all to pass the giggle test,” he told me.
I asked him what his advice was for young people. “Start by serving other people. It said on the wall of my camp as a kid, ‘God is first, others second, I am third.’ And you can’t go wrong with that.”
“You just have to remember those two beings, which is you and everybody else. You’re sharing this planet with 8 billion other people. And that’s enough work to do for anyone.”
Correction: An earlier version of this introduction was incorrect about the number of states with a medical aid-in-dying law.
